Thursday, September 13, 2007

SMS from Grandma

My grandparents are pretty kicked about Peanut - this has been especially a big deal on the maternal side as they are great-grandparents for the first time.

As my maternal Grandfather Dadu, who wasn't too well at the time, sleepily and gruffly informed Vijay on the phone - when he was supposed to be congratulating him on her birth- 'I am a Great-grandfather. YOU, are only a father'.

Anyway, I thought my maternal Grandmother, Didu, would be the most likely out of my four grandparents, to get a possible kick out of reading my blog. Around half of Vijay's height, she is very fond of him and loves to hear about his antics.

So I took a printout of the last few posts about him and Peanut and had it sent across to her, complete with pictures and all.

Indeed, she was delighted. And she sent me a series of SMS's to convey her delight.
Now, she has had a mobile for some time, but it's taken her a while to learn how to use SMS - and you have to give credit to an 80-something year old to be able to learn it at all.

But the fact is that she does find it a bit difficult and each SMS takes about as long for her to type out, as writing a letter would - and sometimes it still turns out obscure and needing some deciphering. By the way, she has been a teacher of English, and therefore, the following SMS's stand as testament to the effort, in fact, struggle behind each painstakingly typed word.

Her first SMS, and I quote word for word:

'Welcome to Peanut woderful Y love V so much one cant say baming light focussed on Pnut or PAPA One grand news PROUD GGP wanted toannounceto whole world misng'

Fair enough. She likes it, loves Vijay more than she can say, something about whether Vijay or Peanut is the star, its the first time they are great-grandparents and want to announce it to the world.

And then this follow up message two days later:

'Fir$t reading rapid what coming next n next Second relaxing tasteing each word with immense joy V vijayed inner core of the readers' hearts Ys simple btiful natural flow of language depictin the true story must have left something for the young hearts to emulate Pnut is the centre God save her'

Clear. She read it quickly first, breathless with anticipation and is now re-reading it and savouring it. Vijay is winning over the reader's heart and she likes my writing. Something about young readers being encouraged to emulate (us?...Heaven forbid! only a grandmother would be so blinded by love)...and Peanut is the center of it all. God Save Her.

Hang on! God SAVE her? I'm sure she meant God BLESS her. Must clarify on this point.

Hah. Be like that. Et tu, Didu?

(Note to self - leave out this post when printing next instalment of blog for Didu - or risk being denied the pleasure of future cryptic SMS's)

My adorable, adorable grandmother.


  1. That's just darling! You are very, very lucky.

    My own grandma is almost completely deaf now so I can't talk to her on the phone any more. I miss chatting with her....

    Btw, have done your quirk tag.

  2. Wow, she's such a darling and so adaptable! SMSing in such cryptic language at 80! I am ... awed! (Actually even I can't do that! :P)

    so utterly butterly cute. Okay.. that line seems to be becoming my trademark.

  3. Wow- hope to be so hep when I'm a GGM! ( not even a gm yet, though my husband is majorly wannabe g'pa)
    She's so beautiful- WOW!

  4. A whole post dedicated to my Mozer!

    And she looks so beautiful - she's a gorgeous looker, we know, but look at that wonder on her face!

    Oh, yes, her essemessess can be SO confusing. Here's the last one I got -
    "So expensive but a waste when cant talk Will send weekly sms Feel ur loving arms around only bring more tear$ but sothing D eat fruits h orlicks salty n sweet"

    Quite an achievement, eh? And thank God for the capitals that mark each new thought / sentence, for there's a WHOLE LOT in this message:

    Obviously, first she's saying how expensive it is to phone, perhaps telling me not to waste my money. Dreaded but all the same very welcome weekly sms ess to follow.

    She's missing Mamu, especially with his anniversary coming up, ... my arms (flapping around and about? Hit her in the face, perhaps...) both make her cry and soth her. ;-)

    Lastly, Daddy, of whom she had been complaining that he would hardly eat anything was now drinking Horlicks with salt and sugar. (Yukk!)

    I think I shall start saving Ma's sms ess. Too bad I've already deleted some gems. Some day, I shall publish a compilation. It could get to be like the anecdotes we have of the Hindi she speaks. Here's a specimen:

    Grass-cutters come to our door, asking for water. As Ma gives it to them, they ask, "Aapka Babu nahin hai?" (Your husband isn't with you?)

    We'd just lost our help and were looking for one, so Mapy goes, woe-begonely, "Nahi, mere paas babu nahin hai. Mere ko ek babu laa ke do, na!"

    Obviously, she wasn't asking them to get her a husband!! Perish the thought! What she meant was, No, I don't have a servant. Do get me one!

    But those grass-cutters had that sick look on their face as they left ...

    And don't worry, she implores God to save us all. At first I used to think it was on the lines of 'God save the Queen', but now I rather think it's just her translation of the Bengali, Bhogobaan o-or rakkha koruk, and just used 'save' instead of 'protect'.

    My sweet, beautiful, gentle Mapy. I love her so.

  5. Sorry, sorry, I got carried away back there. Hadn't realized how long it had gotten.

  6. dear all - she is lovely, isn't she?

    and mash - not at all - those stories are priceless gems...babu..ha ha ha...

  7. oh!! That was the sweetest post I have ever read. How precious are these words! How much you will always savour it! I loved seeing her picture. It just gave me happiness looking at it. And please please please don't share this post with her. We need to see more of these priceless SMSs!!

  8. OMG. what a cute post! I am so glad you blogged about it.. now you will never loose em. And she looks so beautiful in the picture!


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