Saturday, November 18, 2006

And the Heart says..

There was this one scholarship I won a few years back; just for kicks today, I went to the site to see what I had written in my application. To my utter shock, I found the following:


...Following her heart and taking up commerce as her choice of study, she took admission in Sri Ram College of Commerce....

Had they ever warned me that what I wrote in my application form would be up on the Internet, I would have thought more carefully about what I wrote. I don't remember writing that! Can I sue? And if I do, do I have to return the scholarship money?

Just to clarify, my heart did not say that I should take up commerce!! Whose heart ever says that?

I can just imagine it:

Mama: Beta, what will you be when you grow up? Doctor? Lawyer? First woman in space?
7 yr old Y: No way, Ma! My heart says it's commerce all the way for me!
Mama: (taken aback) But what will you do after that?
7 yr old Y: Depends..what's 'commerce', Mama?

But that brings me back to the question: what does my heart say? It says so many things, which are utterly impractical (okay then: impossible!) to actually do.

- Fly a plane one day (or least go paragliding)
- Be on stage with U2 ( without having to do it by sneaking past their bodyguards)
- Write a best selling book (move over, Rowling)
- Win the Nobel Prize ( I have a fabulous concept I am working on, but I can't share it because there are a lot of unscrupulous people out there-like yourselves- who might steal it)

One day, I hope to have a more realizable vision, which I can then turn into reality. But when will that happen?

I just love the quote which goes 'Some of the most interesting people I know still don't know what they want to do at 40'.

It fills me with hope. Maybe turning 40 won't be so bad.

On the other hand, what's the point of being interesting to some arbit dude when you're still as confused at 40 as you were in younger days? He's making money on this kind of cheesy quote while you're still dreaming and trying to figure it out. Sigh.

Alternatively, I could work on enjoying what I already have. You know, just enjoy the ride. It's a lot easier and makes sense.


Naaah. I'm going for the Nobel Prize. Or something.


  1. am still not commenting until you say sorry. say sorry. say sorryyyyyyy

  2. "It fills me with hope. Maybe turning 40 won't be so bad."

    All I can say is, I'm well beyond 40 (Oh, no! Have I said too much? You won't ban me will you? Rest assured, I SHALL sue you for discrimination on the basis of AGE!!!)..

    Well, as I was sayin', I'm well over 40, and still haven't the foggiest idea as to what it is I want to do....

    Go ahead and ban me, and see what I do to yuh! ;-)

  3. In a world with 6 billion people there must be someone whose heart does tell them they should study commerce. Maybe Bono's secret, frustrated dream was to be a chartered accountant. It's a comforting thought.

  4. actually lalesque your desires are strangely similar to phoebe's - from friends in case you're wondering. she also wanted to fly a plane and fantasized winning a nobel prize for a massage :) and she actually also tried her hand and writing!!

  5. oh my i unconsciously influenced by something as meaningful as an American Sitcom? She isn't even my favorite character!! Damn!

  6. I meant meaningless, i meant meaningless


Hi there. Go on, say it. Well? WELL?