Friday, July 30, 2010

Seriously, though. Teen bachhon ki ma??

Seriously? Me?

The thing about having blogged for a few years now is that the blog serves as a reminder of what kind of a person you were and have now become. The time I started writing this, I was the kind of person who couldn't understand why anyone would ever have kids. Now, while I'm not exactly the opposite in terms of saying I can't understand why anyone would choose not to have kids, I certainly do understand it. And how.

Anyway, Peanut turned 3 years old a couple of days back and we had a little party for her. She cut a Noddy cake and was generally quite happy even though it wasn't a kiddy party - her two cousins being around is a party for her anyway.

She's at an age where she's a complete mixture of angelic and sweet behavior and complete and utter defiance. Too late one is realizing that the last few months of pregnancy and the last month of being away from her have resulted in lack of enough routine and attention in terms of instilling some sort of discipline. Well, she's hardly devoid of all form of discipline but it's not been enough. Her eating and sleeping and playing routines are completely awry resulting in really late bedtimes, crankiness, too much TV (and Vijay's iPhone - man, can that kid operate it or what!) and will take some time to correct . But I'm at a stage where I know I need to pick my battles, so will have to take it slow.

But she is incredibly sweet in many ways and very sharp about observing and picking up things, and sometimes exhibits such great understanding and maturity that I'm only left marveling at her and hope that somehow these qualities don't get inhibited by anything that we do. Overall, I think she's going to be okay.

It's clear she's going to be a great big sister - she's already very fond of her brothers and kisses them often, giggling at their funny faces and noises and looking quite stricken when one of them starts to cry.

The next few months are going to be very, very interesting to say the least. And did I mention that the concerns now about getting proper help to take care of the kids are now striking me hard? I have a really good part timer who is currently staying till about 7 p.m. to help and she's actually brilliant - she's been my cook for the last two years so there is also that basic level of trust with her. Unfortunately, like so many in her situation, she is saddled with a husband (with the usual drinking problem) who is shouting at her about being away from home and is 'forbidding' her to work here for too long, so she may not be able to keep it up beyond a couple of weeks. So what is someone to do?

Some practical advice here would be much appreciated. Please do share your experiences with help through agencies - would really help me. I've been lucky enough to have the K to help with Peanut but now she is barely able to manage her and the twins are going to be far more work. I need to fix this in the next few months before going back to work - so yeah, the word would be 'help!?' right about now.


  1. oh for the days when there was that second cousin thrice removed who was a "certified spinster" and could help you with the kids...or the relative from the "village" who could help out and get an education in return. I would say start exploring the family tree.

  2. Congrats on the family of 5 now. Just curious. Are you entitled to 2x maternity leave in your case? ;)

  3. I do have friends in Delhi who've hired help through agencies and a few of them are really happy. I've heard it helps to specifically ask for help from the north-east/ Darjeeling/ Cal/ Nepali girls, they're usually very good.


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