Keeping up with the Lal-Sharmas

Pickle walks up to me, looking both pensive and guilty.

'Yes, Pickle? What happened?' I say gently.

'Mom.' He bites his lip, and then holds up his fist. With his other hand, he points towards it 'Don't do this with your hand, ok?'

'What? What do you mean?'

'This thing.' He indicates the middle of his fist. 'This part. You should not do that.'

'What are you talking about, Pickle?'

'It's rude.' He exclaims, getting frustrated.

'What is?'

He holds out his middle finger and flips me the bird. 'THIS. This is a very rude thing!'


*****

Peanut keeps asking me questions about her homework. This annoys me as it interrupts me and also reveals my ignorance about various topics.

'Why don't you go look it up?' I complain. 'You can find all these answers on the internet.'

'Ah yes.' She smiles cheekily. 'But it's easier to blame you than the internet if it's wrong.'

*****

Vijay and I have taken to watching Suits on Netflix. I tried hard to avoid watching any series because of the time-suck they end up being, but we're hooked.

We both like hotshot arrogant but good-hearted lawyer Harvey Specter although of course he is too-good-to-be-true, like most of the show. His secretary Donna, Vijay suspects, of being in love with Harvey.

'How do you know?' I demand.

'You can just tell, it's in her expressions.' He says smugly.

'Umm...Vijay, you do realize...we're watching a TV show...she's only acting.'

'Yeah but I can still tell.' He says smugly. 'She's not that good an actor.'

****

I tell Vijay, making sure Peanut is in earshot 'Our daughter is so bright. She's going to totally be a scientist. Some sort of inventor. I wonder what she'll end up creating for the world.'

Peanut pauses and looks at me.

'Ah! There you are!' I exclaim. 'What are you going to create for the world, Peanut?'

'I was thinking a blueberry flavoured Jolly Rancher Lollypop.' Shoots off the smart-mouth before skipping off.

****

It's just about midnight. The twins have fallen asleep in our room. Of course a parent's love grows when they see their children peacefully in never - never land.

I see Vijay too, gazing fondly at Papad. He leans over and whispers in our son's ear.

I am curious about this display of fondness and move in to hear what he is saying. Only when I am much closer can I make out that he is gently but firmly repeating in a soft lilting way,

"Daddy's the best...Daddy's the best.... Daddy's the best..."

*****

Because a picture says a thousand words. This is how a six year old chooses to carry your yoga mat home post Zumba class.

*****

And when your kid is finally old enough to plan her own birthday party.

And this is how she writes about her first love, reading.

Even though it's clear she's frustrated that someone left us in charge.

And her brothers come up with these gems.

And his twin brother, when asked to write what questions he will ask on his class field trip to the farm, comes up with this list.

*****

But the best part is when your family provides you with material so that your long-time publisher HarperCollins loves your latest manuscript and decides to publish it in November 2017.

Designing a Fuller Life

Quite a wonderful experience delivering this talk at TedX, SIU Lavale, Pune. The kids at Symbiosis are awesome! 

This is a program worth trying out!

Fabulous program. Not based on dance, but high intensity tempo training.

Incidentally, I believe this program's license is being opened up even to non-Zumba instructors in 2017.

Check it out!

The Best Way To Celebrate a Birthday - EVER

So a couple of days ago it was my birthday. You'd think that if you were turning thirty seven, the excitement of the celebration would be more muted than previous years.

You'd be wrong.

First of all, clearly I have the best and most creative team at Genpact - the kids who work with me in CSR and Diversity. About a week prior to my birthday, or maybe more, they'd started planning a visit to an NGO opposite our office, the Desire Society in Suncity for HIV positive kids in Gurgaon. One by one, they started to sneak the plan to me, each one telling me not to tell the others, barely able to contain their excitement and stating they were just telling me to make sure I didn't make other plans. I assured them that I would act surprised, and that given that Vijay was out of town, we had no major plans for the evening.

So between 5 p.m. and 7 p.m. we were to go and celebrate with the children. Despite having known about this visit for days, I hadn't got enough detail from any of my team members about the ages of the children - and it was only at about 2 p.m. that I started to enquire what the plan really was. It turned out that the team had contributed to collect several thousand rupees which was being used to sponsor the children's meal for the day, including the treat of non-vegetarian food. I thought that was fantastic and immediately wanted to contribute - except that I only had a couple of hours left to organise anything for them.

I turned to my go-to guy Prashant of Giftark in Nirvana Courtyard. Unlike many toy shop owners who are strangely grumpy, Prashant is a genuinely nice and friendly guy who always has the best idea about what kids will like. It was a busy day for him, but upon my persistent calling, he got on the phone with me and then we immediately started to exchange messages on whatsapp - he shared several options with me for gifts until I finally cried to him 'Prashant, you just pick what you think they will like!' I had told him the kids ages, but we basically settled on these crazy light-up mugs for the younger kids and another set for the older ones - pretty cool, with straws and lids and all. I sent my driver to go and pick up the gifts, telling Prashant not to bother with the wrapping. Being the guy he is, he also happily agreed to give me the stuff on credit, and in fact, threw in a discount, saying 'It's for a cause - I'll do my bit too.'

Safe with the gifts in the car, and only slightly late, I rushed home to pick up Pickle, Papad and Peanut, who also had been looking forward to this unusual celebration for about a week. We were all supposed to perform for the kids, and I took my guitar to accompany Peanut's singing, except that she developed cold feet and I was the one in our family who sang. But I wasn't alone - my team displayed their talents, especially Young Krishna who turned out to be an amazing musician, playing the Djembe and the flute for the kids, getting everyone to dance and sing along. Young Shrutunjaya, we already knew was a fabulous singer, trained in Carnatic music and he did his jugalbandi with Krishna's instrumental capability. The rest of my team clowned around and danced with the kids. But it was the kids and their own performances that really lit up the evening for us.

The two hours passed by in a flash, with cake cutting and stand up comedy and performances and general partying -  and my own kids mingled with the others easily, with Pickle especially immediately making new friends. The youngest girl in the house, a little sweetheart of merely two years was feeling unwell and cranky - it was the older kids who carried her around and tried to cheer her up. Thankfully, when she got her hands on the glass handed out as a gift to her, she was delighted and went around showing it to everyone.

I find it hard to describe how I felt. We usually blow money on parties and gifts to celebrate and the pleasure is momentary; but it really lasts when you make a connection like this. I know for a fact I'm going back there to meet the kids - I was really struck by the sense of humour, the desire to express themselves, and the kind of caring and affection that they showed each other as a group - and I'd like to be able to do something for them on an ongoing basis.

My own journey with volunteering on weekends began at the Happy School a couple of years ago; and sadly it's been a while since I went back there. But the impact of that experience has been high - it's what gave me the clarity that I wanted to try my hand at a role where I could make a difference to society and lo and behold - after more than a decade as a marketing professional, here I am leading Corporate Social Responsibility and Gender Diversity globally at a large organization. But the fact is that it tends to get so busy that while there's plenty of interaction with NGO leaders in my job, and much by way of strategic planning and operations at a organizational level - the interaction with actual beneficiaries of these NGOS isn't as high as I'd like it to be, and that's something I'm hoping changes as this year progresses.

All in all - this was an amazing experience, and I actually think if more organizations, including our own, do more to encourage celebrations and team building activities of this nature, we'll start to see more volunteering, more awareness and more connections with the outside world - and that's definitely a good start.

And I know, for one, what it means to have a team that cares - and one that's created a memory that will last for a long, long time. One that deserves to be shared. And therefore, enjoy these few clips!







And hey look - I just discovered this cool Facebook plug-in - it contains the above two videos, and more ;)

Take Me To The (Children's) Movies

For several years, I didn't even think about going to the movies. The kids were small, I was short on time, and I generally wasn't much of a movie-goer anyway.

But I just realised over the past few months that the occasional trip to the cinema makes for a great family outing. It's comfortable, what with online booking and Uber, and the kids love it, and hey, I must admit - I think I enjoy the movies we watch almost as much as them. I have also noticed that these movies for kids nowadays actually make for really decent overall entertainment.

While I'm thinking that this year I'm going to have to be more disciplined about my writing and therefore will cut back on the movie thing, I look back fondly at some of the films we saw over the last year. And just because I feel like writing a one-or-two line summary of what we thought about it, I'm going to do so!

In no particular order but however they pop into my head now, they are -

The Jungle Book - I remember being really impressed by the animation in this film - very life-like. The Mowgli character was very likeable too, although I wouldn't call the kid the greatest actor in the world. We all went for this and enjoyed it - I would have liked the music to be a little more pronounced in the movie, but the reinterpretations were pretty good.

Zootopia - what a great film this one was! It brought about the subtleties of bias and discrimination in a really clever way. This has to be among my favorites, although I really don't know about whether it would pull me in for a second or third watch.

Nil Battey Sannata - Peanut and I both have fond memories of this one because it was the only movie that just the two of us went for - wait, until one more later. Still, I was advised that if you have a daughter, go ahead and take her for this film, so I did and she really liked the movie a lot - and is still fond of 'Maths me Dubba Gul' as a song. I personally thought it was mildly overrated and predictable but still enjoyed it.

Moana - another great animated film. I thought the singing in this movie was pretty stellar and I really liked that the main protagonist wasn't this pretty princess but a rather daring and feisty daughter-of-the-chief. But my favorite character in the movie was the demigod Maui, and my favorite song is 'You're Welcome' - the one that he sings when Moana first meets him in her quest to 'restore the heart of Te Fiti' and save their land.

Kung Fu Panda 3 - the children loved this film, but I really thought it was Meh. They laughed throughout. Of course, it may have also been that I was traumatized by the fact that I had lost Pickle in the mall (for about three minutes but that's enough). More about that another day, but I resolved never ever to take 10 kids to the mall for a birthday celebration by myself.

Storks - So Storks was also one of the watchable, fun and eminently forgettable films of 2016. Much like Kung Fu Panda 3 according to me.

Trolls - Ah, much better. Trolls also featured some really great music and animation. I quite like Justin Timberlake's voiceover for the grouchy troll Branch, and Anna Kendrick's singing. 'True Colours' was the discovery of that month for me, and I even performed it as a duet with Nikhil, my guitar teacher yesterday.

Dhannak - very sweet as a movie, a great story, and again, the music is very nice in this movie but hell yeah, those two child actors - especially the girl who played Pari - amazing. I connected with her right from the beginning of the movie to the end, and the fact that this was both predictable and unbelievable as a film was more than made up for by just how endearing the two children are and the way that their bond as brother and sister is showcased in the film.

Ice Age 3 - yeah, frankly, I don't remember a thing about this one, so I guess it's kinda in the Kung Fu Panda/Storks category for me.

Pete's Dragon - I do remember the storyline of this one vividly. It's a decent film and the children really liked it a lot - but this was one movie that I remember actually getting bored by, which really didn't happen in the other cases. Sweet, warm, nicely made but nothing stellar.

Finding Dory - it lacked the magic of Finding Nemo somewhat, but then it was centered on a character played by the lovable Ellen Degeneres so that kind of made it one of the better films of the year for me. I liked this one.

The Good Dinosaur - I actually like this movie a lot but the kids seem to have enjoyed other films more. They found it sad that Arlo lost his dad ( this is not a spoiler - it happens really early in the film) but I was very taken by the little boy 'Spot' and how he behaves so much like a puppy - except when he's being a ferocious little tiger.

Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them - now we're talking! This was a GREAT watch. I loved the special effects, and I loved the main characters in the film and how they were cast and developed. The nervous, distracted and very focussed Newt; the No-mag ( Muggle) Mr. Kowalski -and of the two sisters, I really liked Queenie. The entire thing about setting story in the Wizarding world in America and the references to Hogwarts and characters we are familiar with thanks to the Harry Potter series. JK Rowling really has created her own parallel universe and we are lucky to be part of it. I bought the screenplay and thought it was okay ( only a million times better than that Cursed 'The Cursed Child' - but found myself wishing it had been written as a proper book)

Dangal - you may notice it's one of the only three Hindi films in this list ( would you call it Hindi, it's more Haryanvi perhaps). I'm not (at all) a fan of Aamir Khan, but I have to say I was totally, totally captivated by this film. We all went for this one, Vijay included, and enjoyed it from beginning to end. The casting and the acting and the dialogues and the music ( we have had some GOOD music in the movies in this list) was all really great, and the story in the film about grit and determination and girl-power, all good. The only slight issue I had with this film is that the part where Aamir Khan's youth was shown seemed too limited and short to me, so it felt as if something was missing there - but that's a small price to pay for an overall brilliant film. I think for me, it may have even competed with Fantastic Beasts, and that is really saying something. The masterstroke here is that the final match was handled on the strength of the main protagonist alone, and it's not like she 'owed' anyone anything for it. (Not that there is anyone left in this country who hasn't seen Dangal, but I've tried to be vague about it here to avoid a spoiler!)

So that's it. That's how many of my weekends were spent last year. I'm really very keen to cut back on the movies in 2017. (Not doing too well on that, saw 'Sing' today and it was just about decent, ha ha ha)

How about you? How many of these films did you catch in the last year? What did you and your kids think? 

Meri Christmas, Teri Christmas

''Meri Christmas, Teri Christmas, Sab ki Christmas...'

I rolled my eyes and laughed as I finished watching my Zumba teacher Sameer shouting into a video-selfie on Facebook Live, where he had just showcased the mad festivities and dancing at his Delhi Salsa Club studio.  What a clown, I thought, shaking my head. I put away my phone and went to sleep.

And then, hours later this morning, when I finished my own Zumba class this morning and walked back into my house, this caught my eye.

Peanut had brought out this tree from our store-room a month ago. I grumbled for a while and then gave up. I watched over the weeks as she painstakingly untangled wires and created paper decorations and used cotton balls for snow. And today, here it stood. My favourite corner of our home, with my bookshelf, Peanut's piano, Pickle's guitar, the photograph of her playing at a concert looked even warmer and prettier to me.

And then all of a sudden I was transported back to about thirty years ago (my GOD) - to a time when I was just about seven, and had read in some book about the tradition of putting up Christmas Stockings to be filled with goodies. I was fascinated by the idea, and being a child faithful to what I read, I dug out those of my socks that didn't have holes and tucked them up on the shelf near the head of our bed. One for my sister, and one for me.

My mother came home from work and saw them and questioned me as to why I was being even weirder than usual. I explained that these were the Christmas Stockings and I assumed that they would be filled up with Christmas goodies by Santa, the visitor in the night. Candy canes, I said, and earnestly described that they were like little walking sticks but edible and in red and white stripes. Mother listened in a bemused manner but didn't say anything. Soon it was time for lights out.

In the morning, I scrambled to check my stockings. And Lo and Behold - Santa had indeed come - what was this? Ten rupee note, a Dairy Milk Chocolate and raisins and nuts! A veritable feast. Me and my sister were in ecstasy. How can I explain to you the joy of a seven year old eating Kishmish straight out of her sock?

And there it was. I stood there look at the Christmas tree set up for my own daughter, and felt tears pricking at my eyes. In our family, we don't really look at festivals as serious religious occasions - they're just yet another reason to celebrate. And it could be Holi, or Diwali, or Halloween ( the kids favourite) or Christmas. Traditions are being reinvented, and to all the naysayers who roll their eyes and outrage about how we as a country are being westernized and losing touch with our own roots and all that righteous stuff, I send out a big kiss, and can only repeat the words of one of my gurus, who once wisely stated...

'Meri Christmas, Teri Christmas...Sab Ki Christmas!'

*****

P.S Happy Holidays and here's wishing us all a wonderful 2017

Book launches & Fantastic Beasts in my Home

It's been quite a couple of weeks.  In between the regular commitments, launching both my new books 'When Love Finds You' and my first kid's book ever, 'Peanut Has a Plan'  - and this along with travel to Mumbai for a work conference and some serious effort at racing against time to get ready not one, but two presentations for an important discussion.

Quick round up of whatever has stayed with me through the blur -

1. Atta Gallata is a wonderful store in Koramangala Bangalore - they stock only Indian authors, which is very, very refreshing. (And by the way, have you read this piece on the elitism in Indian media written by my publicist at Harper's?)Did an event there last Saturday, it's a warm, wonderful place. If you're lucky enough to live in my favourite city, check it out. The funny part is it turned out to be started up by a first cousin of my batchmate and friend from IIMB!

                   Holding forth at Atta Galatta Women's Web Event. Books all around and a live audience. Never happier!

Women's Web had organized this event and it had an audience of 50 very engaged women who asked great questions on the theme of 'Women at Work.' My co-panelists were the impressive Vaishali Kasture, Partner at Delloite, and Malini Gowrishankar, Entrepreneur by day and VO artist by night, who did an impromptu reading of my book blurb.

Here's a link to a video of Vaishali asking me a question about being multifaceted.
Here's an article they wrote featuring me prior to the event.

Some other pictures from other recent events -

             
     Gurgaon Moms event at Cafe Nowhere. That second one above is me and Amrita, my favourite book marketing person of       all time. See how she's finger-pointing even as I show affection? Typical.

  With a special bunch of bloggers delighted to be in conversation at an actual publishing house office, Harper's office in Noida. 

                             With Manasi (my editor) and Amrita (aforementioned publicist) at the Truly Madly Office.

2. With all of this, I happened to be out last weekend and missed my younger son's Papad's school performance. Which would have been quite heart-renching had I actually missed it - because thanks to technology and timing, I managed to sit in my hotel room at Lemon Tree and watch the whole thing on FaceTime. My husband very sweetly arranged for enough battery and front row seats so that I didn't miss a moment of the stage performance. The kid was somewhat assuaged by my recounting of the whole thing, including his rather shy dance on stage and the fact that he 'fell down once but jumped up immediately like a Jack in the Box.'

I was glad to be here this weekend because this time it was Pickle's performance. He too was in a dance and had an actual real dialogue which he delivered with great panache even though he stood just to the right of the spotlight so only his front-row parents could see him. I must say that even though technology is wonderful, it was great to actually be here and be with him during the entire morning madness of 'Will you PLEASE get on your Khakhi shorts, and for the love of God, do NOT wear that white shirt until you've finished your breakfast.' This was Vijay, of course, I couldn't care less but it was nice to be able to hear all the yelling. The performance was both short and sweet and then we were home for the afternoon; and in the evening, we went together for a musical performance at the school where Peanut and I learn music for a 'Terrace Jam' which was also great fun. Even though Pickle & Papad found Soya Katori packets meant for twenty people and finished them all by themselves - after sweetly handing around single pieces to the rest of the audience.

3. I cannot quite believe how Peanut is already behaving like a teenager. She's reading like crazy most of the time around the house and a big help when it comes to managing her six year old brothers, except when she ignores them stealing Soya Katoris and except when she actually decides to turn into a six year old herself and then it's like managing triplets-gone-mad.

Here's some of the stuff you get to hear from her -

(After she finishes explaining to Papad that great can also be written as a g-r-8) '...And There's a Lot You Don't Know About Growing Up, Boy' - followed by a condescending pat on his head.

(After complaining about how she's getting tired following me around the mall, and hearing about the store we're going next) Oooh, Shopper's Stop? Great, I thought you'd NEVER stop!

I just took her to watch Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, and what a movie it is. Please go ahead watch this one (Vijay and I also took the kids for 'Trolls' which was thoroughly enjoyable too but can't compare to this one).  This flick had the kind of special effects around Magic that would have lifted the Harry Potter series to the next level, in my opinion - and very good casting too. We had a debate about whether all of us should go but my six year old twins saw the trailer and opted to stay home themselves and just watch TV. Kids today are pretty smart. So it was just her and me because Vijay's decided to traipse around farms on the weekends, and we had a great time together. We were both less irritable without the men in the family around.

In fact, we were late for the movie, and usually getting late gets her goat - I hate being late for anything, and she particularly hates being late for movies. Uber wasn't working for some reason so barely with five minutes to spare, we rushed out of the house and managed to get an auto.

'There's nothing like an auto to spoil your hair.' She yelled over the roar of traffic as we sped along and I held on tightly to her.

'Yeah.' I agreed, pushing my hair out of my eyes.

'And we've never been this late for a movie before!'

'Yeah.' I had to admit. We barely had four minutes to spare although our guy was smartly snaking around traffic and making decent speed.

After a beat, she snuggled a little deeper into my arms and remarked cheerily 'This is fun.'

It took me a moment but I looked at my first born and realised something.

'Yeah.' I said, my grin broadening. 'It is.'